frodar
10-10-2004, 02:32 AM
There will be no nursing home in my future.........
> >
> > When I get old and feeble, I am going to get on a
> > Princess Cruise Ship. The average cost for a
> > nursing home is $200 per day. I have checked on
> > reservations at Princess and I can get a long term
> > discount and senior discount price of $135 per day.
> > That leaves $65 a day for:
> >
> > 1. Gratuities which will only be $10 per day.
> >
> >
> >
> > 2. I will have as many as 10 meals a day if I can
> > waddle to the restaurant, or I can have room service
> > ( which means I can have breakfast in bed every day
> > of the week).
> >
> > 3. Princess has as many as three swimming pools, a
> > workout room, free washers and dryers, and shows
> > every night.
> >
> > 4. They have free toothpaste and razors, and free
> > soap and shampoo.
> >
> >
> >
> > 5. They will even treat you like a customer, not a
> > patient. An extra $5 worth of tips will have the
> > entire staff scrambling to help you.
> >
> >
> >
> > 6. I will get to meet new people every 7or 14 days.
> >
> >
> >
> > 7. T.V. broken? Light bulb need changing? Need to
> > have the mattress replaced? No Problem! They will
> > fix everything and apologize for your inconvenience.
> >
> > 8. Clean sheets and towels every day, and you don't
> > even have to ask for them.
> >
> >
> >
> > 9. If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip
> > you are on Medicare. If you fall and break a hip on
> > the Princess ship they will upgrade you to a suite
> > for the rest of your life.
> >
> >
> > 10. Now hold on for the best! Do you want to see
> > South America, the Panama Canal, Tahiti, Australia,
> > New Zealand, Asia, or name where you want to go?
> > Princess will have a ship ready to go. So don't
> > look for me in a nursing home, just call shore to
> > ship.
> >
> > P.S. And don't forget, when you die, they just dump
> > you over the side at no charge.
> >
> > When I get old and feeble, I am going to get on a
> > Princess Cruise Ship. The average cost for a
> > nursing home is $200 per day. I have checked on
> > reservations at Princess and I can get a long term
> > discount and senior discount price of $135 per day.
> > That leaves $65 a day for:
> >
> > 1. Gratuities which will only be $10 per day.
> >
> >
> >
> > 2. I will have as many as 10 meals a day if I can
> > waddle to the restaurant, or I can have room service
> > ( which means I can have breakfast in bed every day
> > of the week).
> >
> > 3. Princess has as many as three swimming pools, a
> > workout room, free washers and dryers, and shows
> > every night.
> >
> > 4. They have free toothpaste and razors, and free
> > soap and shampoo.
> >
> >
> >
> > 5. They will even treat you like a customer, not a
> > patient. An extra $5 worth of tips will have the
> > entire staff scrambling to help you.
> >
> >
> >
> > 6. I will get to meet new people every 7or 14 days.
> >
> >
> >
> > 7. T.V. broken? Light bulb need changing? Need to
> > have the mattress replaced? No Problem! They will
> > fix everything and apologize for your inconvenience.
> >
> > 8. Clean sheets and towels every day, and you don't
> > even have to ask for them.
> >
> >
> >
> > 9. If you fall in the nursing home and break a hip
> > you are on Medicare. If you fall and break a hip on
> > the Princess ship they will upgrade you to a suite
> > for the rest of your life.
> >
> >
> > 10. Now hold on for the best! Do you want to see
> > South America, the Panama Canal, Tahiti, Australia,
> > New Zealand, Asia, or name where you want to go?
> > Princess will have a ship ready to go. So don't
> > look for me in a nursing home, just call shore to
> > ship.
> >
> > P.S. And don't forget, when you die, they just dump
> > you over the side at no charge.