Mr. Pitiful
10-12-2004, 11:47 PM
Aries (March 21 - April 19)
As you are walking along selling roasted peanuts, you will notice someone leaning back in a chair. You should stop and insist that they bring their seatback to a full upright and locked position until the captain has turned off the sign. And that’s just riding in the bus.
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Dorothy Parker once said "if you can't say anything nice, come sit next to me." Today that will be strangely relevant to your own situation.
Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
Too much "musk" in that cologne - don't try it. Or if you do, bring along a few carrots for the moose.
Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
Remember: good people are good because they gain wisdom through failure. Happily, there's every reason to believe you'll become much better soon! If not, then you can remind me later.
Leo (July 23 - August 22)
You will overhear people talking about you today, and realize that you have a reputation as a real stud hombre cyber-muffin. You will find that intensely irritating, since you’re the opposite sex.
Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
Good time to be unspecific. Instead of being a day late and a dollar short, for example, just try to be late and short. See how much easier that is?
Libra (September 22 - October 22)
Not a good time to discuss sauerkraut or your eating habits. At least not if you value your friendships, and your sanity.
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
You've been trying to sell your car, and it just isn't going anywhere. Sometimes it helps if you have a name for your vehicle, to give it more character. I call mine the "Millenium Falcon." My passengers often become irritated at being called "Chewie" or "R 2 D 2," though.
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)
Today old Beatles songs will be playing everywhere you go. Eventually this will make you twist and shout, until you work it all out, after a hard day’s night.
Capricorn (December 22 - January 20)
Your neighbors will have a wild party, which you'll catch glimpses of through the open window. You'll know you shouldn't watch, but it's just hard to imagine how people can do that, especially on a trampoline.
Aquarius (January 21 - February 18)
Someone will give you a card, today. It'll be nice. But they do expect something in return.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
High winds today. Partly cloudy at times, especially in high elevation, you can expect a 20 percent chance of showers in the evening….Aha! Didn’t know I was a weather man too, did you…. Good day to try out your new cement kite!
Have a Great Day!
And thanks for reading my silly stuff.
:D
As you are walking along selling roasted peanuts, you will notice someone leaning back in a chair. You should stop and insist that they bring their seatback to a full upright and locked position until the captain has turned off the sign. And that’s just riding in the bus.
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Dorothy Parker once said "if you can't say anything nice, come sit next to me." Today that will be strangely relevant to your own situation.
Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
Too much "musk" in that cologne - don't try it. Or if you do, bring along a few carrots for the moose.
Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
Remember: good people are good because they gain wisdom through failure. Happily, there's every reason to believe you'll become much better soon! If not, then you can remind me later.
Leo (July 23 - August 22)
You will overhear people talking about you today, and realize that you have a reputation as a real stud hombre cyber-muffin. You will find that intensely irritating, since you’re the opposite sex.
Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
Good time to be unspecific. Instead of being a day late and a dollar short, for example, just try to be late and short. See how much easier that is?
Libra (September 22 - October 22)
Not a good time to discuss sauerkraut or your eating habits. At least not if you value your friendships, and your sanity.
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
You've been trying to sell your car, and it just isn't going anywhere. Sometimes it helps if you have a name for your vehicle, to give it more character. I call mine the "Millenium Falcon." My passengers often become irritated at being called "Chewie" or "R 2 D 2," though.
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)
Today old Beatles songs will be playing everywhere you go. Eventually this will make you twist and shout, until you work it all out, after a hard day’s night.
Capricorn (December 22 - January 20)
Your neighbors will have a wild party, which you'll catch glimpses of through the open window. You'll know you shouldn't watch, but it's just hard to imagine how people can do that, especially on a trampoline.
Aquarius (January 21 - February 18)
Someone will give you a card, today. It'll be nice. But they do expect something in return.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
High winds today. Partly cloudy at times, especially in high elevation, you can expect a 20 percent chance of showers in the evening….Aha! Didn’t know I was a weather man too, did you…. Good day to try out your new cement kite!
Have a Great Day!
And thanks for reading my silly stuff.
:D