BooBooKitty
10-14-2004, 03:07 PM
Hope y'all like this. I was LMAO first time I read it.:D
WHAT'S Y'ALL'S SIGN?
>> >
>> >It has become pretty obvious to us Southerners that our present
>> >astrological signs have served their purpose and that we should
>>now get
>> >rid of them. When I'm out driving around I'll see bulls, and once
>>in a
>> >great while I suppose I'll even see a ram. Up the street from me
>> >there's some twins, but I don't see them much. The rest of these
>>things
>> >are just too obscure. You only see crabs on vacation. There
>> >are no lions or scorpions, not many archers and no damn
>> >water bearers. Virgins? The neighborhood's not crawling
>> >with them either. SO, what we need here is some relevance.
>> >We need things we can recognize up there in the night sky.
>> >
>> >OKRA Dec 22 - Jan 20
>> >
>> >Although you appear crude, you are actually very slick on
>> >the inside. Okra have tremendous influence. An older Okra
>> >can look back over his life and see the seeds of his
>> >influence everywhere. Stay away from Moon Pies.
>> >
>> >CHITLIN Jan 21 - Feb 19
>> >
>> >Chitlins often come from humble backgrounds. Many times they're
>> >uncomfortable talking about just where they came from. A chitlin,
>> >however, can make something of himself if he's motivated and has
>>plenty
>> >of seasoning. When it comes to dealing with Chitlins, be very
>>careful.
>> >Chitlins can burn and then erupt like Vesuvius, and this can make
>>for a
>> >really terrible mess. Chitlins are best with Catfish and
>> >Okra. Remember that when marriage time rolls around.
>> >
>> >BOLL WEEVIL Feb 20 - Mar 20
>> >
>> >You have an overwhelming curiosity. You're unsatisfied with the
>>surface
>> >of things, and you feel the need to bore deep into the interior
>>of
>> >everything. Needless to say, you are very intense and driven as
>>if you
>> >had some inner hunger. Nobody in their right mind is going to
>>marry
>> >you, so don't worry about it.
>> >
>> >MOON PIE Mar 21 - Apr 20
>> >
>> >You're the type that spends a lot of time on the front
>> >porch. It's a cinch to recognize the physical appearance of Moon
>>Pies.
>> >"Big" and "round" are the key words here. You should marry
>>anybody who
>> >you can get remotely interested in the idea. It's not going to be
>>easy.
>> >This might be the year
>> >
>> >to think about aerobics. Maybe not.
>> >
>> >POSSUM Apr 21 - May 21
>> >
>> >When confronted with life's difficulties, possums have a marked
>> >tendency to withdraw and develop a "don't-bother-me- about-it"
>> >attitude. Sometimes you become so withdrawn, people actually
>>think
>> >you're dead. This strategy is probably not psychologically
>>healthy, but
>> >seems to work for you. One day, however, it won't work, and you
>>may
>> >find your problems actually running you over.
>> >
>> >CRAWFISH May 22 - Jun 21
>> >
>> >Crawfish is a water sign. If you work in an office, you're always
>> >hanging around the water cooler. Crawfish prefer the beach to the
>> >mountains, the pool to the golf course, the bathtub to the living
>>room.
>> >You tend not to be particularly attractive physically, but you
>>have
>> >very, very good heads.
>> >
>> >COLLARDS Jun 22- Jul 23
>> >
>> >Collards have a genius for communication. They love to get
>> >in the "melting pot" of life and share their essence with
>> >the essences of those around them. Collards make good
>> >social workers, psychologists, and baseball managers. As
>> >far as your personal life goes, if you are Collards, stay
>> >away from Moon Pies. It just won't work. Save yourself a
>> >lot of heartache.
>> >
>> >CATFISH Jul 24 - Aug 23
>> >
>> >Catfish are traditionalists in matters of the heart, with
>> >one exception: Whiskers may cause problems for loved ones.
>> >You catfish are never easy people to understand. You prefer the
>>muddy
>> >bottoms to the clear surface of life. Above all else, Catfish
>>should
>> >stay away from Moon Pies.
>> >
>> >GRITS Aug 24 - Sep 23
>> >
>> >Your highest aim is to be with others like yourself. You
>> >like to huddle together with a big crowd of other Grits.
>> >You love to travel, though, so maybe you should think about
>>joining a
>> >club. Where do you like to go? Anywhere they have cheese or gravy
>>or
>> >bacon or butter or eggs. If you can go somewhere where they have
>>all
>> >these things, that serves you well.
>> >
>> >BOILED PEANUTS Sep 24 - Oct 23
>> >
>> >You have a passionate desire to help your fellow man.
>>Unfortunately,
>> >those who know you best - your friends and loved ones - may find
>>that
>> >your personality is much too salty, and their criticism will
>>probably
>> >affect you deeply because you are really much softer than you
>>appear.
>> >You should go right ahead and marry anybody you want to because
>> >in a certain way, yours is a charmed life. On the road of
>> >life, you can be sure that people will always pull over and
>> >stop for you.
>> >
>> >BUTTER BEAN Oct 24 - Nov 22
>> >
>> >Always invite a Butter Bean because Butter Beans get along well
>>with
>> >everybody. You, as a Butter Bean, should be proud. You've grown
>>on the
>> >vine of life and you feel at home no matter what the setting. You
>>can
>> >sit next to anybody. However, you, too, shouldn't have anything
>>to do
>> >with Moon Pies.
>> >
>> >ARMADILLO Nov 23 - Dec 21
>> >
>> >You have a tendency to develop a tough exterior, but you
>> >are actually quite gentle. A good evening for you? Old friends, a
>>fire,
>> >some roots, fruit, worms and insects. You are a throwback. You're
>>not
>> >concerned with today's fashions and trends. You're not concerned
>>with
>> >anything about today. You're really almost prehistoric in your
>> >interests and behavior patterns. You probably want to marry
>>another
>> >Armadillo, but Possum is another, somewhat kinky, mating
>>possibility.
WHAT'S Y'ALL'S SIGN?
>> >
>> >It has become pretty obvious to us Southerners that our present
>> >astrological signs have served their purpose and that we should
>>now get
>> >rid of them. When I'm out driving around I'll see bulls, and once
>>in a
>> >great while I suppose I'll even see a ram. Up the street from me
>> >there's some twins, but I don't see them much. The rest of these
>>things
>> >are just too obscure. You only see crabs on vacation. There
>> >are no lions or scorpions, not many archers and no damn
>> >water bearers. Virgins? The neighborhood's not crawling
>> >with them either. SO, what we need here is some relevance.
>> >We need things we can recognize up there in the night sky.
>> >
>> >OKRA Dec 22 - Jan 20
>> >
>> >Although you appear crude, you are actually very slick on
>> >the inside. Okra have tremendous influence. An older Okra
>> >can look back over his life and see the seeds of his
>> >influence everywhere. Stay away from Moon Pies.
>> >
>> >CHITLIN Jan 21 - Feb 19
>> >
>> >Chitlins often come from humble backgrounds. Many times they're
>> >uncomfortable talking about just where they came from. A chitlin,
>> >however, can make something of himself if he's motivated and has
>>plenty
>> >of seasoning. When it comes to dealing with Chitlins, be very
>>careful.
>> >Chitlins can burn and then erupt like Vesuvius, and this can make
>>for a
>> >really terrible mess. Chitlins are best with Catfish and
>> >Okra. Remember that when marriage time rolls around.
>> >
>> >BOLL WEEVIL Feb 20 - Mar 20
>> >
>> >You have an overwhelming curiosity. You're unsatisfied with the
>>surface
>> >of things, and you feel the need to bore deep into the interior
>>of
>> >everything. Needless to say, you are very intense and driven as
>>if you
>> >had some inner hunger. Nobody in their right mind is going to
>>marry
>> >you, so don't worry about it.
>> >
>> >MOON PIE Mar 21 - Apr 20
>> >
>> >You're the type that spends a lot of time on the front
>> >porch. It's a cinch to recognize the physical appearance of Moon
>>Pies.
>> >"Big" and "round" are the key words here. You should marry
>>anybody who
>> >you can get remotely interested in the idea. It's not going to be
>>easy.
>> >This might be the year
>> >
>> >to think about aerobics. Maybe not.
>> >
>> >POSSUM Apr 21 - May 21
>> >
>> >When confronted with life's difficulties, possums have a marked
>> >tendency to withdraw and develop a "don't-bother-me- about-it"
>> >attitude. Sometimes you become so withdrawn, people actually
>>think
>> >you're dead. This strategy is probably not psychologically
>>healthy, but
>> >seems to work for you. One day, however, it won't work, and you
>>may
>> >find your problems actually running you over.
>> >
>> >CRAWFISH May 22 - Jun 21
>> >
>> >Crawfish is a water sign. If you work in an office, you're always
>> >hanging around the water cooler. Crawfish prefer the beach to the
>> >mountains, the pool to the golf course, the bathtub to the living
>>room.
>> >You tend not to be particularly attractive physically, but you
>>have
>> >very, very good heads.
>> >
>> >COLLARDS Jun 22- Jul 23
>> >
>> >Collards have a genius for communication. They love to get
>> >in the "melting pot" of life and share their essence with
>> >the essences of those around them. Collards make good
>> >social workers, psychologists, and baseball managers. As
>> >far as your personal life goes, if you are Collards, stay
>> >away from Moon Pies. It just won't work. Save yourself a
>> >lot of heartache.
>> >
>> >CATFISH Jul 24 - Aug 23
>> >
>> >Catfish are traditionalists in matters of the heart, with
>> >one exception: Whiskers may cause problems for loved ones.
>> >You catfish are never easy people to understand. You prefer the
>>muddy
>> >bottoms to the clear surface of life. Above all else, Catfish
>>should
>> >stay away from Moon Pies.
>> >
>> >GRITS Aug 24 - Sep 23
>> >
>> >Your highest aim is to be with others like yourself. You
>> >like to huddle together with a big crowd of other Grits.
>> >You love to travel, though, so maybe you should think about
>>joining a
>> >club. Where do you like to go? Anywhere they have cheese or gravy
>>or
>> >bacon or butter or eggs. If you can go somewhere where they have
>>all
>> >these things, that serves you well.
>> >
>> >BOILED PEANUTS Sep 24 - Oct 23
>> >
>> >You have a passionate desire to help your fellow man.
>>Unfortunately,
>> >those who know you best - your friends and loved ones - may find
>>that
>> >your personality is much too salty, and their criticism will
>>probably
>> >affect you deeply because you are really much softer than you
>>appear.
>> >You should go right ahead and marry anybody you want to because
>> >in a certain way, yours is a charmed life. On the road of
>> >life, you can be sure that people will always pull over and
>> >stop for you.
>> >
>> >BUTTER BEAN Oct 24 - Nov 22
>> >
>> >Always invite a Butter Bean because Butter Beans get along well
>>with
>> >everybody. You, as a Butter Bean, should be proud. You've grown
>>on the
>> >vine of life and you feel at home no matter what the setting. You
>>can
>> >sit next to anybody. However, you, too, shouldn't have anything
>>to do
>> >with Moon Pies.
>> >
>> >ARMADILLO Nov 23 - Dec 21
>> >
>> >You have a tendency to develop a tough exterior, but you
>> >are actually quite gentle. A good evening for you? Old friends, a
>>fire,
>> >some roots, fruit, worms and insects. You are a throwback. You're
>>not
>> >concerned with today's fashions and trends. You're not concerned
>>with
>> >anything about today. You're really almost prehistoric in your
>> >interests and behavior patterns. You probably want to marry
>>another
>> >Armadillo, but Possum is another, somewhat kinky, mating
>>possibility.