Mr. Pitiful
09-09-2004, 12:25 AM
Aries (March 21 - April 19)
Something is about to become overly intimate with you. Intimacy can be good. Just not with fungus.
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Today you will be chased by a short Mexican dude in white attire, wearing a big sombrero and shouting ARRIBA , ARRIBA. ANDALE, ANDALE, ….not to worry, it’s only me.
Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
You will be hired as a cook/housekeeper for 7 extremely short gentlemen, who all live together. Stay away from apples, for a while.
Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
Nobody knows the trouble you've seen. Let's just hope you can somehow keep it that way!
Leo (July 23 - August 22)
You will have a great temptation to eat Sea Food, but as you get to the restaurant , you find out you left your money at home, so you end up there, just to see food. Bummer again.
Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
Today you will walk by a beautiful gorgeous girl, with a body of a goddess, and to your amazement, she winks at you…..But you can’t do a darn thing about it, your girlfriend is walking with you. Darn it!! Ain’t that a Bummer?
Libra (September 22-October22
will be a great day to get your eyes checked, cause if you couldn’t see that five dollar bill on the sidewalk, as you came in, then there is something terribly wrong with your sight.
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
Someone will attempt to get you to stay in one place today, by telling you that you are surrounded by 100 black poisonous snakes (which are invisible). You will make a daring escape, despite the risk involved.
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)
Today will be your un-lucky day. You will get a ticket for speeding, It’s weird though, you weren’t even driving. Figure that out….
Capricorn (December 22 - January 20)
Better have that spot checked out by a doctor. Sure it may look benign, but sometimes those carpet stains can spread.
Aquarius (January 21 - February 18)
You will contemplate nothingness today, but somethingness will keep intruding upon your thoughts.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
This may be a little late, but heck, late is better than never. You know when they said to shop naked, they meant online.
:D
Something is about to become overly intimate with you. Intimacy can be good. Just not with fungus.
Taurus (April 20 - May 20)
Today you will be chased by a short Mexican dude in white attire, wearing a big sombrero and shouting ARRIBA , ARRIBA. ANDALE, ANDALE, ….not to worry, it’s only me.
Gemini (May 21 - June 20)
You will be hired as a cook/housekeeper for 7 extremely short gentlemen, who all live together. Stay away from apples, for a while.
Cancer (June 21 - July 22)
Nobody knows the trouble you've seen. Let's just hope you can somehow keep it that way!
Leo (July 23 - August 22)
You will have a great temptation to eat Sea Food, but as you get to the restaurant , you find out you left your money at home, so you end up there, just to see food. Bummer again.
Virgo (August 23 - September 22)
Today you will walk by a beautiful gorgeous girl, with a body of a goddess, and to your amazement, she winks at you…..But you can’t do a darn thing about it, your girlfriend is walking with you. Darn it!! Ain’t that a Bummer?
Libra (September 22-October22
will be a great day to get your eyes checked, cause if you couldn’t see that five dollar bill on the sidewalk, as you came in, then there is something terribly wrong with your sight.
Scorpio (October 23 - November 21)
Someone will attempt to get you to stay in one place today, by telling you that you are surrounded by 100 black poisonous snakes (which are invisible). You will make a daring escape, despite the risk involved.
Sagittarius (November 22 - December 21)
Today will be your un-lucky day. You will get a ticket for speeding, It’s weird though, you weren’t even driving. Figure that out….
Capricorn (December 22 - January 20)
Better have that spot checked out by a doctor. Sure it may look benign, but sometimes those carpet stains can spread.
Aquarius (January 21 - February 18)
You will contemplate nothingness today, but somethingness will keep intruding upon your thoughts.
Pisces (February 19 - March 20)
This may be a little late, but heck, late is better than never. You know when they said to shop naked, they meant online.
:D