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Fun Bar Pages
New
FDA Warnings
The FDA is considering additional
warnings on beer and alcohol bottles, such as:
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may make you think
you are whispering when you are not.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol is a major factor
in dancing like a jerk.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to
tell the same boring story over and over again until your
friends want to SMASH YOUR HEAD IN.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to
thay shings like thish.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe
that ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them
at 4 in the morning.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering
what the hell happened to your pants.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may cause you to
roll over in the morning and see something really scary
(whose species and or name you can't remember).
WARNING: consumption of alcohol is the leading cause
of inexplicable rug burns on the forehead.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may create the illusion
that you are tougher, handsomer and smarter than some really,
really big guy named Chuck.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe
you are invisible.
WARNING: consumption of alcohol may lead you to think
people are laughing WITH you.
WARNING: Consumption of alcohol may cause an influx
in the time-space continuum, whereby small (and sometimes
large) gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.
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