Funny Bar Jokes

The Mermaid
A man was sitting in the bar when he noticed another patron a few stools away. The guy had a body like Arnold Schwarzenegger, but his head was the size of a grapefruit.

The first man said "Excuse me for staring, but I cant help but be curious as to why your body is so well developed, but your head is so small?"

The man said "buy me a drink and I'll tell you." The drink was ordered and the story began.

I was in the navy and my ship was sunk by a torpedo. I was the only survivor and I managed to swim to a deserted island a few miles away. I had been there for several months and was walking on the beach one day looking for food and when I looked up I saw a beautiful mermaid sunning on a nearby rock.

She swam over to me and told me that she was a magical mermaid and could grant me three wishes.

That's great I said. I'd like to be rescued. She slapped the water with her tail and a ship appeared, sailing straight for my island.

Next I asked for a body like Arnold Schwarzenegger. Another slap of the tail and I was built like a Stallion.

Then, noticing how beautiful she was and only one wish left, I asked if I could make love to her. She said no it just wouldn't work her being half fish and all, so I said, "well, how about a little head then?"